What I would've said...

To the lovely young Indian girl in the bumblebee skirt and blouse chatting obliviously on her Swarovski-crusted cell phone...

"Darling...the stripes on the pavement don't stop cars when you walk out in front of them at unguarded street crossings - just like stop signs and stop lights don't stop other cars when you're driving..."

In other words - you're lucky I didn't hit you...and may not be so lucky with the next driver. Less talk. More walk.

Pay freakin' attention!

What I would've said...

To the mid-level managebot at the Fulton County Tax Commissioners office...

"I hope you get some satisfaction from snapping your rude, incomplete responses to the people who pay your salary because one day - you will be on the side of the glass wall that smells like dirty laundry and will be the recipient of less than helpful information delivered unprofessionally."

There. I feel better.

Stay tuned...